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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:32 am Post subject: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
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 I  stumbled  upon  this  at  vM  forums,  found  some  amusement  from  it...
 
 10  Things  I  Hate  About  Quake  (The  Most  Obscure  List)  
 
 On  December  2,  1999,  a  game  that  would  revolutionize  online  gaming  forever  was  born.  Unfortunately,  there  were  a  few  factors  that  kept  this  game  from  being  truly  great...  
 
 1.  No  orange  color?  What  the  fuck?  Honestly!  ID  can  make  red,  green,  yellow,  blue,  light  blue,  purple,  white,  black,  another  red,  and  another  black...but  no  orange?  Two  shades  of  blue...like  a  player  really  needs  that  much  pressure  on  their  shoulders  to  decide  between  them.  With  orange  there  would've  been  so  many  cool  combinations!  For  example,  white/black/orange.  
 
 2.  Noobs.  Every  game  has  them,  we  all  know  that,  and  they're  annoying  as  hell.  But  we  can  learn  from  them  as  well.  We  can  learn  about  how  we  used  to  play  this  game.  We  can  learn  to  respect  the  fact  that  they  might  not  be  as  coordinated  as  us.  We  can  learn  to  totally  rape  them  and  laugh  at  them.  We  can  learn  to  make  them  diconnect  after  we  do  an  awesome  rail-jump  or  two  and  shoot  them  while  we're  strafing  while  demoing  ourselves  to  make  it  into  our  new  avatar  or  siggy.  We  can  learn  a  lot.  
 
 3.  iTDM.  Instant  Team  Deathmatch.  What's  so  instant  about  it?  The  game  lasts  15  fucking  minutes!  
 
 4.  1v1's  are  up  here  as  well.  For  some  reason  players  find  it  appealing  to  try  and  beat  someone  in  a  campfest  match  that,  when  they  win,  will  say  "Oh  yea!  Oh  yea!  I  pwned  your  ass!"...Congratulations!  you  beat  someone  on  the  other  side  of  the  nation  in  a  game  that's  been  around  for  10  years  while  they  were  running  around  looking  for  your  camping  ass.  Oh,  you  beat  me?  Awesome.  I'm  going  to  make  love  to  my  girlfriend  and  go  out  to  dinner  while  you  practice  your  accuracy  in  Dallas.  See  you  tomorrow  ;D  
 
 5.  Teammates.  Some  are  smart,  but  for  those  who  aren't,  this  little  number  is  dedicated  to  you.  Why  the  FUCK  do  you  spam  my  teamchat  saying  "MELT  HERE"  every  2  seconds?  We,  as  "professional"  quakers,  are  used  to  the  overwhelming  fact  that  everyone  has  TeamOverlay.  So  there's  no  need  to  tell  me  where  you  are!  I  die  from  someone  shooting  me  in  the  back  because  you  were  having  fun  saying  "rofl"  over  and  over  after  you  got  shot.  I  despise  you...  
 
 6.  Noghost.  Why  is  it  called  Noghost?  It's  pronounced  No  Ghost  right?  Does  this  mean  ghosts  aren't  allowed  to  play  quake?  What  if  God  let's  some  angels  have  a  day  off  and  they  want  to  play  only  to  find  out  they  can't  because  they're  not  human?  One  day  the  ghosts  are  going  to  rebel  and  make  a  NoHuman  mod  that  will  have  all  the  best  configs  and  gametypes  and  we  won't  be  able  to  play  because  we  just  had  to  be  isolated  from  them.  Way  to  go  guys.  
 
 7.  Clans.  There's  too  many  to  count,  and  too  many  people  in  them.  Plus  the  tag  designs  are  hideous.  From  a  fashion  point-of-view,  they  would  get  burned  in  a  wood-fired  stove  before  you  could  say  "My  tags  are  l33t!"  Also,  why  do  clans  claim  they  are  "original"?  Clans  have  been  around  forever,  even  since  medieval  times.  If  anything,  you're  no  better  than  the  guy  who  wrote  Twilight.  
 
 8.  Tag/Name-stealers.  Why  do  they  really  think  it's  fun  to  take  someone's  name?  It's  not  fun,  it's  annoying.  I  have  to  track  down  your  IP,  ban  you  from  everywhere  only  the  have  you  reset  your  modem,  and  I  have  to  tell  everyone  that  that's  not  really  me.  You  know  what  name-stealing  is?  It's  identity  theft.  I  should  sue  you.  
 
 9.  Pigskin.  That's  not  a  map!  That's  a  cheap  imitation  of  what  we  would  all  love  to  be  paid  $20  million  to  play  on.  There  aren't  even  any  cheerleaders.  Very  disappointing.  
 
 10.  Slash.  Her  gesture  is  one  of  the  most  amazing  sounds  ever  heard  from  a  woman.  Admit  it  guys,  if  we  found  a  woman  with  those  kind  of  moaning  abilities  she  would  be  a  keeper.  But  Slash  purposely  has  that  gesture  knowing  full  well  that  we  will  never  be  able  to  touch  her...What  a  tease.  
 
 
 Hopefully  now  you  understand  the  seriousness  about  this  game  and  the  issues  it  has.
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 10:12 am Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
--Riddick--
Obligated2Own
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 Lol,  some  are  alright  I  guess.
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 10:13 am Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
Relapse
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 funny  stuff
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 10:31 am Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
Jesus
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 lol  Smile
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:14 am Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
Nightmare
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 #3  is  wrong,  lol.  ¬†=/  ¬†Instagib,  not  Instant.


Last edited by Nightmare on Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:08 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:09 pm Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
SenaToR
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 6  and  8  =  fail
 
 the  only  one  i  agree  with  is  #10
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:14 pm Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
killa|poo
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 Yeah,  some  people  still  think  why  it's  called  Noghost  :P
 
 thing  is  that  baseq3  (due  to  it's  bugs)  let  you  go  through  some  walls,  hence  the  "ghosting"  :P
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:27 pm Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
ReAper
Obligated2Own
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 I  wish  we  had  orange  enemycolor  (only  thing  good  about  nemesis  when  i  used  it).
 
 
   Crying or Very sad
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:41 pm Post subject: Re: 10 Things I Hate About Quake (courtesy of Tool) Reply with quote
ThEOLdGuY
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 cg_enemyColors  "#FE9942:#FE9942:#FE9942:#FE9942"
 
 
 cg_enemyColors  "#FE9856:#FE9856:#FE9856:#FE9856"
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